As the years go by, you and your significant other may find yourselves thinking back to the beginning, innocent, golden days of your relationship, when you courted each other with compliments, dates out on the town, and romance. More variables start entering your life as you both pack on the years, ones that often distract, misconstrue and confuse you both. Fortunately, there are ways to return to those days of yore, as well as those feelings that came with them.
You must be keen in identifying negative aspects of your relationship, so you’ll know when to make an opposite approach. You’ll probably need to thin-out some of your everyday activities to make for more quality time with your man. Moreover, the most important aspect of a relationship that often goes stale and untreated is effective communication.
Looking Your Best
A lady typically always tries to look her best; however as her relationship with her man stretches on and on, she may not feel obligated to look her best. She believes her spouse loves her for who she is, and rather not for how she looks. The real truth is that good appearance can turn on light bulbs in the male mind. Looks aren’t everything, but they sure can help.
We’re not talking about getting completely decked out every single day; this is merely a suggestion of hygiene and presentation. You may try wearing even a little more makeup, despite your wife/mom status. Making sure your hair is groomed and presentable, dressing a little more tightly and colorful, and taking care of your skin and body are all measures you can take to impress your spouse, as well as improve your confidence.
Reaching Out Positively
Enough bickering, scolding and telling him to do things all the time will cause him to ignore you. The time has come for you to return to that flirty, complimentary delivery when you speak with him. If he looks nice, tell him. If he’s done something for you that you really liked, tell him, but make sure it’s in a way that intrigues him. Men like that flirty side of a woman, when she bats her eyes at him and makes him feel special.
This is an issue of self-confidence, and whether or not your man is self-confident will dictate how he treats you and feels about the relationship. Any achievements he’s recently acquired must be met with genuine approval and commemoration from you. You are the center of his life, the one he goes to work for, and must let him know that you appreciate it.
The Power of the Written Word
There were days; an age when love-letters and poetry ruled romance. This love facet need not go unexplored and undiscovered; it is essential to communication. It can often be difficult to express our feelings through the spoken word, and by sitting down and writing something for our lover, we have more time to think about what we say, how we say it, and how the reader may perceive it.
Anyone can rhyme a word with another, and this is the basis of poetry. Send your man a poem detailing your favorite attributes about him. If you’re not one for rhymes, a simple, straightforward letter will do fine. Even sneaking a post-it note or memo in his wallet, car or lunch bag can really cause some smiles. Women sure do love their love-notes, but men can appreciate them too. It’s a way to be unobtrusive and allows the reader to catch your drift in silence rather than awkward, verbal phrasing.
Going Out Like in the Old-Days
A genuine problem with long-time couples is that they just can’t seem to get together and go out on a date. During your first days together, you and your man probably went out multiple times a week, either with friends or just the two of you enjoying some time together. Nowadays, kids, jobs, stresses, family, and finances may seem to rule your relationship. No matter how busy you are, you must make time for your spouse.
Go out and see a movie, or have some dinner. Go attend a concert of a band or singer that you both enjoy. Head to the club and get some drinks and do some dancing. Drive out to the mountains or beach and soak up Mother Nature together. You must do something outside of the home together. The more of the world you experience together, the more memories you will share, and you probably are running low on memories. Don’t stay home, hit the road and have an adventure together like you used to!
Thinning-out the “Kids Schedule”
Chances are you’re now a mommy, and slowly becoming the prototypical “crazy-mom” of the new millennium. A resurgence of young mothers has some staggering statistics, with more women becoming mothers at younger ages. At a time when women should be enjoying themselves in the prime of their lives, they are raising children and probably missing out on spending time with the father of their children.
Stop for a minute, and reassess your schedule. Do you really need to pick up the play toys right now, or can you spare a half-hour of quality time with your husband? When the children are watching TV, let them watch TV and go forget about them for a couple of minutes. Share a kiss with your man when your kids are safely preoccupied. A man does not find it attractive to be overwhelmed and completely preoccupied with children. A strong, independent mother gets what she needs to get done for her children so that she can be there for her man, as well.
By stepping back and realizing the dire needs of your relationship, you are able to figure out the solutions. Nothing is more important than you and your spouse’s relationship.