Will anxiety goes away?
I ask myself the same question, almost everyday. Nothing feels different as days, months, and years passed. I know there are stories out there giving us motivations to breakthrough, be free, and the anxiety ends.
Well, for some people it may works. But for me, anxiety is endless. It stays with me, and seems like there’s no cure. Those positive thoughts of “you can fly like a bird”, “there’s no mountain too high”, does not apply for me.
Living life with anxiety is thrilling. Not the kind of fun thrill you get when you’re on a giant swing or roller coaster, but the funny, scary thrill you get when you’re under pressure.
The racing heartbeats, fast breathing, shaking movements are your friends. A strange feeling of fear, which you don’t know where it comes and where it goes, it’s just there.
There are moments when life seems normal, but most of the times, you can barely enjoy your delicious meal, the movies you watch, or the peaceful ride you’re having with your family. Something seems always go WRONG.
One minute your’re excited and sit still, where the next minute your negative thoughts start to surround you. Every worst scenarios that probably happen in any situation haunted you, and all of the sudden, you’re scared. You’re anxious. No reason, just thoughts you wish you never even think of.
During rainy or snowy days, it gets worse. When the weather is cold and cloudy, everything around you seems like darkness, ready to eat you up. It’s strange and it feels like it keeps you to stay on your room, does not allowing you to feel fresh at all.
This is when it’s the hardest. I believe nothing makes it better, not even the bright colors of your book shelf. There’s nothing to distract our mind, and the negative thoughts keep pushing in to your brain. Well, this is when your mind perception and your way of thinking can either make you good, or break you bad.
The one thing I figure out slowly as time passes by, is that you need to acknowledge that anxiety is not defeat able. Neither your friends, family, nor you can “fix yourself” and make your anxiety go away in no time. What you actually need to do is letting it come. It takes time and effort, but it is much more effective and helpful more that you’ve expected.
There is no need to be ashamed of your condition, and there’s no need to worry about your anxiety. Not defeating anxiety, does not mean you’re giving yourself in.
By not defeating it, you’re one step closer to handle it professionally. It does not mean that you’re too afraid or too weak either. It’s just showing that you have a different point of view,
Well, anxiety would probably be with you for the rest of your life. Fighting it will only make you exhausted. The good news is, anxiety is not going to be with you EVERY SECOND.
You can go on with your life for days, months, years and not having anxiety. But often, anxiety will find its way back to you, and that’s what most people never expected.
Letting anxiety come, means you’re preparing yourself to the journey. The “life has its up and downs” apply to anyone, and especially to people with anxiety. When you stop fighting, you will open yourself more to yourself. You’re taking the risk to always feel anxious, but what you’ll realize is it will slowly train you to manage your mind, and let negative thoughts flow and fall back to where it belong.
You may not know how to control over the cure, but the amazing part is you always have a chance to control how you handle it. The fear will still be there, but it slowly gets better and you’ll feel less panicked until you’re no longer anticipate your fears anymore.
What you need to work on is the way you think and see things. Anxiety has a higher possibility to take control of your mind, and it’s very tempting to give in to your thoughts. Letting yourself trapped inside a box of “say no”, “you’re bad”, and other scary things, you may not feel like doing anything to your life.
Remember, we’re not alone. Everyone may seems happy and enjoying their moment, but they also have their ups and downs. You’re not the only prisoner of minds, since most people each have a taste of that feelings, doubting themselves and feel useless.